More than a dream
by Maethril2
Summary: Gambit gets to the Institute unaware that someone has been waiting for him and that his arriving will change their lives forever.
1. Prologue I

**(Originally posted in 2011)**

**xXxXx**

_*****__**"There are moments in life when you miss someone so much**_

_**that you just want to take them from your dreams and hug them."**_

**xXxXx**

Bent over the bannister, she contemplated all the beauty in front of her and wondered why she had never noticed how gorgeous the sky could look.

She watched, with eyes full of splendor, how the sea fused to the horizon as the moonlight made the sand shine intensively; sand that looked like a carpet spread out to the sea as restless waves came to kiss it.

There was no sound, except for the waves' lying down. It felt as though the whole world was in deep sleep. Nonetheless, the girl no longer felt alone, not even before the immensity of the sea. Now, she believed to be the most fortunate person who had ever lived.

It felt more like a dream than reality itself.

So that was what Heaven was like.

And on that deserted beach, her eyes sought someone. It amazed her that, even after so long, she would still feel butterflies and excitement as she waited for his returning.

At some point, she closed her eyes and let herself be carried away as she felt the freshness of the night breeze brushing her face and making the light white curtains dance to its sound.

She came back to reality only after she thought she heard a click coming from the door. As she went back inside the room, she fixed a glance at the doorknob; however, to her disappointment, it did not move.

She then decided to go back to the balcony. However, before she could even take the first step, she felt a hot breath in her neck as two strong arms clasped around her waist.

She let out an irrepressible laughter. "Don't you ever use the door?"

He laughed, too; a masculine and genuine laughter that always sent shivers through her body pleasurably. "An' miss de chance to take you by surprise? I don't t'ink so" he murmured by her ear and gave her a lingering kiss on her neck, where he knew to be sensitive. "Besides, old habits die hard, right?" he added, among kisses.

She leaned her head to the side at the moment she felt his lips run down the back of her neck, leaving a trail that burned such as fire. In ecstasy, she turned around so that she could look into the eyes of the man she loved. She wrapped her arms around his neck, stood up on her tiptoe, and kissed him slightly on his lips as his arms brought her closer to him. "You're late" she said with that smile that he had never been able to fully understand. He doubted he ever would.

"I know. Took me longer dan planned. Saying sorry do no good, dough. We're here to be alone, not'ing to get in our way."

She gave a shy smile. "That's what you promised."

"And I always do as I promise" he assured in a whisper.

"What is it?" she asked when she noticed a smirk growing on his lips.

He bent his head forward until his forehead touched hers. "You look so hot in dis lingerie."

She chuckled with satisfaction as she hung her head backwards, so that she gave him full access to her neck. His mouth rushed to it, raining kisses on her.

His lips finally stopped on her mouth, and they fell into a passionate kiss. As intense as the first or the last.

She gave a silently sigh as she desperately tried to get the most out of those sensations still so new to her. He would go on amazing her day after day.

And so her hand ruffled up his long strings of hair as his agile fingers slowly slipped down her thigh. Her legs were around his waist in a flash. Silently, he carried her to bed when words were no longer needed.

He sat down with her on his lap, for her legs refused to let go of his waist. Soon, she started to slowly lift up his t-shirt; when she got to his chest, he raised his arms up to help her take the shirt off more easily.

Her hands laid down on his chest as her curious fingers wasted no time playing with the perfection of his body. Her eyes followed her every move. He felt his whole body shiver to the simple touch of her eager fingers. She smiled at the sight of his muscles contracting, not knowing she was driving him crazy.

He moaned and her astonished eyes fluttered to meet his. What she saw could be boiled down to pure lust. Then she could see nothing else when his lips passionately pressed hers.

Shifting their positions, he laid her down on the bed. The passionate look she flashed at him was enough for him to fill her with dozens of kisses. She chuckled and relished as his lips touched the places that tickled. But she loved that, loved his kisses more than just about everything else in life.

On his knees, he teasingly began to lift her lingerie. The light fabric slid softly up her legs.

The girl's laughter soon turned into moans when she felt his hand going up along with her lingerie. When he got to her stomach, he began to slowly kiss the parts that were revealing until he finally got to her mouth again and ditched her inconvenient clothes.

In a matter of seconds, they had gotten ridden of his pants and every other article of clothing left. All they had now were the bedsheets brushing his bodies.

And, in midst all pleasure, their mouths found each other every time, just like their firmly tangled fingers.

The moonlight contemplated the lover's bodies in that semidark room where they seemed to be one...

Suddenly, she woke up.

Her eyes popped and found the shadows on the ceiling. Looking around, she was in her bedroom. Safe in her own room. Kitty slept like a log in the bed next to hers. Everything was where it was supposed to be. It had been just a dream.

"Just a dream" she whispered to herself as she sat up. Her heart hammering like it was about to go up her throat. The images from the dream she just had filled her mind without permission.

She lost track of time altogether.

"Rogue?" Kitty called her, in a sleepy voice. She had woken suddenly and switched the lamp on, thinking something was wrong. She ended up finding her roommate sitting on the next bed, with a lost look on her face. Kitty got up and took a few careful steps towards Rogue's bed. "You ok?"

"Yeah" Rogue said after a long pause. When her eyes finally focused again, she looked up at Kitty standing next to her bed. Rogue noticed her worried look and tried to smile. "Ah'm fine, Kitty."

Shadowcat was not convinced. Rogue was not as near a good liar as she thought. Kitty then sat down on the floor. "How long have you been awake?" she asked cautiously.

Although she considered Rogue to be her best friend, Kitty knew how easy it was to infuriate her, which happened quite often since the day they started to share a room. In time, Kitty learned not to push Rogue, and they became real friends, even though Rogue was used to showing that in a very unconventional manner. Kitty understood the limitations Rogue faced, and respected her for that.

"Ah don't know for sure" Rogue said, absent-mindedly.

"Did you have another of those _dreams_?" Kitty asked, frowning in worry.

"Ah think this time it was just a dream."

"Why?"

"Because what Ah saw can never happen" she replied in deep sadness.** "**Even though it felt so real" she added intensively. "It won't happen."

"What'd you see?" asked Kitty as she let her preoccupation turn into curiosity.

Rogue looked down at the other girl and replied a little harshly: "Why are you always so nosy?"

To Rogue, it was a simple question; to Kitty, Rogue had crossed the line.

"Why? Because I'm your friend" replied Kitty without raising her voice, although she was obviously hurt. "I've seen you go through a lot of shit... when you had those nightmares of people's pasts, people you'd touched and... and now dreaming of the future" she paused**. **"It's obvious this dream got you badly shaken. You always react odd. I worry about you. Though, sometimes I forget why" she got to her feet and went back to bed.

Rogue felt Kitty's words and remorse hit her hard. She knew that she had no right to snap back at the girl like that; however, answering that simple question would mean to reveal an intimate part of herself, and Rogue was not willing to do that. Snapping was always easier, as much as she tried to change her ways.

"Kitty! Ah... Ah didn't mean to..." she did not know how to do that, did not know how to apologize.

"I know" Kitty said as she lay down on her bed with her back to Rogue. "You never mean to hurt anyone but you always do a hell of a job, anyway."

"Do you really wanna know?"

Kitty shrugged as if she did not care. "Speaking always helps" she turned around to Rogue and sat up cross-legged. "We have very different points of view. Maybe you misinterpreted this dream" she said with a smile; all resentment she felt seconds earlier dissipated, as if never was. Forgiving was, without a shadow of a doubt, one of Kitty's best qualities.

"Fahne. No getting into details, though" Rogue stated, serious.

"Sure" Kitty accepted, happy with her small victory. "Was it terrible?"

"Terrible? No" she shook her head emphatically. "Totally the opposite of terrible."

"Do you think that's why you got so stunned?"

"Maybe. Ah'm so used to nightmares that a good dream seems really shocking" she gave a cold laugh.

Kitty offered a comforting smile and patiently waited for her friend to continue.

Shortly after, Rogue spoke again. "There was this guy—"

"A guy?" Kitty echoed, cutting Rogue off. "Do you know him?"

"No."

"How did he look like?"

Rogue flashed a reprehension look at her. "I said no details."

Kitty shrugged and smiled ingenuously. "What if I know who he is?"

Rogue tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, and continued, now a little shier. "I don't really remember" she lied. She could perfectly recall every detail imaginable, as if that scene had really taken place moments earlier. She had not been a mere spectator, it felt as though she had been really there, living that moment.

"Just tell me what you remember then" continued Kitty. "Did he have, like, any feature that stood out?"

_His eyes_, Rogue thought. But she would not tell about them nor how they made her feel. She would not even know how.

"Well, he was tall, young" she said casually, ignoring Kitty's last question, "brown hair... really handsome" she added swiftly as shame took her over. Rogue's confession made Kitty's curiosity go through the roof, she did not even blink. Rogue never said things like that. "And... and we kissed. And that's it. It's all there is. End of story. The end" she jabbered nervously. She had revealed more than intended.

Kitty guffawed. "That's amazing! You didn't absorb him, right?" Rogue nodded. "That's just amazing" Kitty repeated with increasing excitement. "It means—"

"It means nothing" Rogue cut her off exasperatedly. "It was just a dream."

"I don't believe that, Rogue. I'm sure it wasn't."

She wished it was true. "How can you know?"

"If it was just a dream, like any other dream, you wouldn't've been so shaken. Rogue... you said it felt real."

Rogue fell into contemplation, closed her eyes and took a deep breath in. "It did" she said in an almost inaudible whisper.

With a smile of satisfaction, Kitty went back to her bed, without saying another word.

Rogue remained motionless for a few more instants until at last came back to her senses.

Already tucked in her bed, she closed her eyes and dared to fall asleep once again. She drifted off still feeling that dream in all senses. A smile would not leave her face. For the first time in so long, she allowed herself to have hope.

**xXxXx**

* Quote by Clarice Lispector


	2. Prologue II

**xXxXx**

That was not the first time he woke up scared in the middle of the night. It had been like that for as far as he could remember, even when he was just a child on his own.

Only now, the nightmares were different.

That night, just like many others of the last few months, he seemed to be transported back to Paris, to the fateful night in Notre Dame. The scene always the same: he watched her fall without being able to save her, not matter how hard he tried.

In some of his dreams she would return to place the blame on him; he did not need that, though, for he knew that he was responsible for what had happened, that he deserved to be reminded of what he had done. The sight of the girl falling down would torment him for the rest of his life, he was sure of it. Still, it did not seem to be punishment enough.

With some effort, he sat up in bed.

"What is it?" came the voice of the sleepy blonde girl next to him.

"A nightmare" he replied trembling as he tried to collect himself.

She sat up as well and laid a hand on his sweaty shoulder, caressing it in an attempt to cool him down. "Again?" she asked, however, her tone of voice did not sound as concern to his ears.

Gambit nodded his head in the affirmative, avoiding to look at her directly. "Don't need to worry, Bell. It was just a bad dream."

Noticing the indifference in his voice, she tried to turn the dark mood around. "Wouldn't it be because you're anxious?" she asked, smiling as her fingers softly went down his arm.

"_Quoi_?" he asked despite himself and at last turned to Bella Donna. He knew that look well. "_Oui_, sure. Must be it" he said carelessly.

If Bella Donna did not notice, then she pretended to. Her tone, on the other hand, was completely unlike his. "Can you believe it's in two weeks?" and laughed out of excitement.

Gambit forced a smile. "Hard to believe."

"Dere's still a lot to do. I mean, my dress ain't done yet. I told dad to teach dat sorry-ass dress-maker a lesson–"

"Bell..." he cut her off delicately, not wanting to be rude "I better go" he was in no mood for her prattling on about dresses and shoes and other futilities to which she gave too much importance too often.

"Why?" she questioned, genuinely disappointed "It's early."

"Your dad or brother find me here, we'll be in trouble."

She smiled slyly. "Dey've never caught you here, silly. You've always been faster and smarter dan Julien. Besides, you aren't de cautions type" then flashed him a mischievous smirk. "You like to play wit' fire."

"Not tonight" he replied distractedly as he struggled to see in the semidark room, trying to remember where he had left his clothes.

"What do I have to do to make you stay?" she seductively ran her fingers up his thigh under the covers. Gambit gripped her hand before it got to a place that could make him change his mind.

He turned to her. "I'm tired, Bell" he stated gravely, trying to convince her that it was true. He then got to his feet in order not to give her time for more objections. Grabbed his pants, shirt and all pieces of clothing carelessly tossed away on the floor hours earlier.

Bella Donna sighed in defeat and quietly watched Gambit get dressed, ready to grab any opportunity that presented itself. It came up when he sat down on the bed to put on his boots. Slowly, Bella Donna put her arms around his torso.

Still, it was not enough. "I really gotta go, Bell" he said with little patience he had left. Sluggishly she let him go. Gambit stood up and gazed around the room one last time in order to make sure he hadn't left anything behind.

"And my farewell kiss?" she asked like a spoiled girl.

She could be so childish at times, he thought.

Gambit kissed her on the lips lightly to please her. Swiftly, Bella Donna grabbed his shirt and gave him a long and assertive kiss at the same time trying to lure him into bed again. She fell on her back with him on her.

Her lips and tongue desperately trying to persuade him to stay and play a little longer. Gambit reciprocated her kisses fervently at first, but before her fingers could unzip his jeans, Gambit parted their throbbing lips.

"Damnit!" she snapped, panting. Her body wanted more. "I can't believe you're gonna leave me like dis."

"I'll be back tomorrow" he assured unresponsively, straightening his shirt as she had crumpled it again.

Bella Donna sat up on the bed, seemingly resigned at last. "It because dat nightmare, right?"

Gambit flashed her a glance for not longer than an instant. "I have a headache."

That much was true. He wouldn't tell her that the pain increased because of her, though.

"All right" she admitted her defeat. "_À demain, cher_" and offered him a sincere smile.

With a seductive blink of his eye, Gambit went out through the window.

Seeing no other alternative, Bella Donna went back to bed alone. Although, before she could fall asleep, she heard knockings on her door.

There were no doubts as to who would be so late at night. Bella Donna remained silent and tried to just ignore it, pretending to be asleep. It was not enough, though. Next time, the knockings were even stronger.

Exasperated, Bella Donna got to her feet and opened the door – which she would always remember to lock every time Remy was in with her. Her brother, Julien, stepped inside unceremoniously.

"I heard voices" he said, getting worked up as he looked into the bedroom, as if in hopes of finding someone.

She impatiently crossed her arms over her chest. "What are you talking about? I was sleeping before you almost knocked my door down."

Julien paced the room fretfully, not buying his sister's words. He then halted before the open window, suspicious.

Bella Donna thought it was a smarter move to get that all over with quickly before he bombarded her with more accusations. "All right" she said, drawing his attention away from the open window. If he questioned her in that regard, Bella Donna would simply say it was open due to the hot weather.

Julien anxiously stared down at her. "I'm waiting."

"De TV was on. Happy now?"

Julien sneered. "Don't underestimate my intelligence, sis. He was here, wasn't he?"

"Who?"

"Who else? Dat filt'y t'ief."

The disgust in his voice was the most she could take. "_Dat filt'y t'ief_ is my fiancé. It's time you sucked it up."

"Never!" he yelled.

Bella Donna shut up, taken aback by her brother's aggressiveness. She could not remember seeing him that furious ever before. Julien had always kept his impulses under control and, suddenly, he was raging for no apparent reason right in front of her eyes. At that moment, she did not recognize her brother, and feared for him.

Realizing it was fright in Bella Donna's violet eyes, Julien struggled to collect himself; however, when he tried to approach her, she stepped back.

The furious expression on his face shifted completely, now his look was of hopelessness. He was desperate to make his sister believe that she was about to make a huge mistake. "He's not good enough for you, Bella" he came closer to her a little more but Bella Donna remained on defensive mode. "I'm your brot'er, it's me you have to love."

"I do love you, _mon frère_."

"Den stay wit' me."

She paused and picked her next words carefully. "It's not abou' choosing sides, Julien. You my brot'er, I'll always love you, but... you have to understand dat I love Remy, too, in a completely different way" calmer, she made an attempt to touch his face but now it was Julien who backed off.

"You love dat thief more than your own brother... your own blood" he yelled; his arms made incoherent gestures. "I won't allow it, you hear me? I won't let them take you away from me" after that he stormed out of the room.

Bella Donna attempted to follow him but stopped at the door as he had already disappeared through the long corridor.

Bella Donna went back to bed confused about what had just happened. Julien seemed to be slowly losing his mind. She didn't even want to imagine her father's reaction if he saw Julien's behavior.

Luckily, the Boudreaux Guild's patriarch, Marius, slept one story up, far enough from the children's bedrooms. In the following morning, Bella Donna would talk to her brother, as soon as he had collected himself.

* * *

In a matter of minutes, Gambit was back home. Silently as required of a thief, he climbed up his bedroom's window and lay down in his own bed, relieved. Unfortunately, it was not enough for him to go back to sleeping. Barely slumbered.

He remembered Bella Donna's excitement for the wedding, and felt something that resembled guilt for being incapable of sharing the sentiment.

He loved her, no doubt about that. He had loved her since they were children, in a simpler time, when their love was pure. That didn't mean that Remy was eager to tie the knots so young. That decision wasn't his.

Truth was, once again, he had no control over his own life.

* * *

He hated that part: waking up in a stranger's room, with a stranger by his side, and many times, like that one, with a hangover.

It did not matter how good the night had been, waking up not knowing where he was and sneaking out was not a pleasant experience. It was the price Gambit had to pay for not wanting to take any girl into his own room.

One day closer to his wedding, he remembered as he got up and out of the room without giving a second glance to the girl in the bed. Now, less than a week to go until the ceremony.

Walking down the hall, he recognized where he was: a small hotel next to the club where, the previous night, he had his stag party with everything it demanded.

Nonetheless, before he needed to think about how he would return home, he saw his brother waiting for him at the café across the street.

"I hope you had fun" said Henri ironically, as soon as his brother took a seat at the chair next to him.

"You have no idea" replied Remy, ironically as well, and with a smirk.

"Great, 'cause dis is de last night you woke up wit' a stranger in your bed."

"You really good at putting your little brother down, Henri."

"I hope you understand de magnitude of de situation" he said, staring at his brother with severity. "You know very well what I think abou' all dis. It's not too late t' turn back. You know you'll have my support."

"It's de deal" Remy said as if he had it memorized. "I can't turn back."

Henri took a deep breath and laid his hand on his baby brother's shoulder. "You just a boy. You can't decide de rest of your life based on one single decision. Look... we'll talk to father, he'll figure out a way around it."

"If dere was another way, dis deal wouldn't've been made in de first place" replied Remy, incisive in every word. "It's de least I can do after all you done fo' me."

"You're not less my brother because you don't have my blood, Remy. Can't believe you doing dis out of gratitude. Your happiness is at stake here."

The decision, however, had never belonged to him. "I know very well what's at stake. An' it's much more than dat. You, of all people, should know what I'm saying."

Henri did. He was favorable to the wedding from the start. Months later, he wasn't so sure anymore. He clearly understood what the union of the two kids would implicate to both Guilds. But now, seeing his brother in the state he was in, it was hard not to feel selfish. The peace between the Thieves and the Assassins Guilds had always seemed unattainable; it was not a mere wedding ceremony that would put an end to a secular feud.

"I like her, Henri" said Gambit, contemplative. "You told me a thousand times dat you wanna spend the rest of your life wit' Mercy"

"Liking is not de same as loving, Remy. I love Mercy while you... you can't even be faithful to dat assassin. You aren't in love wit' dat snake" added vehemently.

"Don't call her dat, Henri. Bella Donna isn't like you think, she… she's a good person. You just don't know her."

"Don't be a fool. Ya don't really believe your own words. She's a Boudreaux. Worthless, jus' like de rest o' her family."

"Ya not judging Bella Donna fo' what she is, but for what her family is" stated Gambit. His tone, though, was not of reprimand, there was certain melancholy in every word he said.

Henri paused in order to choose his next words more carefully. Pulled up his chair closer to his brother. "Not'ing like dat. De t'ing is she's showed her true colors many times before."

"Dis wedding is our only hope to end de fight between de Guilds once and for all" Remy replied, condescending as to the fate he believed to be inevitable.

"Don't be so naïve, Remy" said Henri, raising his voice almost imperceptively. "Don't fool yourself t'inking dis wedding will cease all fighting."

Remy diverted his eyes from his brother, trying to conceal whatever it was he was feeling at that moment. "_Non_... but it's de first step."

After a brief pause, Henri continued, for now, fed up with his own insistence. "Well..." he exclaimed, defeated as he stood up. "No use arguing. Come on. Tante Mattie must be worried sick about you."

"Only about me?"

"You her favorite."

* * *

Once they got home, Henri went up the stairs silently; Remy, on the other hand, went straight to the kitchen. He was famished and the inviting scent coming from the kitchen made his hunger stronger than his headache. After a long good morning kiss on Tante Mattie's cheek, he sat down at the table.

Tante Mattie stopped and flashed him a suspicious look. She knew the kid well enough to see there was something bothering him. "What's wrong, boy?"

Gambit made a naïve face. "Not'ing, _tante_."

She wasn't convinced. Squinted her dark eyes, and guessed: "Bad night?"

He smirked. "Not at all."

All of a sudden, Tante Mattie grabbed the dish towel on her shoulder and used it to hit the insolent boy. "Show me some respect, boy" and turned her back, grumbling.

"Dat one hurt!" he complained, rubbing his arm.

"Dat's what I was goin' for. What in de world? Ain't you ashamed fo' what you doin' to your fienceé?"

Gambit snorted. "Not in de mood for another lecture, _tante_. 'sides, it be my last week."

"And dat give you de right t' do whatever you want?"

Gambit didn't answer, preferred to leave instead. He knew better than to get into an argument with Tante Mattie.

"What abou' breakfast?" she yelled to no avail. Remy was already going up the stairs.

Through the ajar door of his office, Jean-Luc saw his son run to his room. He stopped his work and went look for Tante Mattie.

"What's de matter?" he asked her in the kitchen.

She sighed, discouraged. "Dat boy been insufferable."

"What's new in dat?"

Tante Mattie smiled subtly, knowing it was true. "Seem to be getting worse."

Remy seemed to be drifting away, Jean-Luc knew it and found only one reason for the increasing usualness in his younger son's behavior, and he was the cause. Although, being a proud and determined man, Jean-Luc wouldn't admit to being wrong. He strongly believed to be doing the right thing.

"He must be anxious about de wedding being so close as it is."

"I dunno" replied Tante Mattie. "You have to talk to him, Jean-Luc" she added in her usual authoritative tone.

* * *

"Why's everyone nagging on me today?" complained Gambit when he got to his room and found Henri waiting for him, comfortably sitting in his armchair.

Gambit dropped on his back on the bed and lit up a cigarette that he had picked up in the bottom of a drawer.

"You know what _tante_ will do if she sees you smoking here, don't you?"

"She won't" he snapped back, presumptuously. "Being her favorite comes wit' advantages."

Henri stared at his brother silently.

Gambit tried to ignore but was no use. "Father won't be happy t' know you're trying to talk me out of de wedding."

"All I'm doing is trying to help you see all de angles."

Remy shot him a leery glance from the corner of his eyes. "What do you know?"

Henri got to his feet and slowly walked up to the window before answering. "It's no secret dat Julien Boudreaux isn't at all pleased wit' giving his sister's hand in marriage to a 'filt'y t'ief', in his own words. He's been acting strange – more den usual, anyway. I suspect he's up to something."

Gambit barely listened. "He's jealous of his sister. He hates our guts."

"Sometimes it seems to be more dan a feud between Guilds" continued Henri, watching the garden outside. "_Julien est unniais_. I'm afraid of what he can do."

"He wouldn't. He's a coward scared of his daddy."

"I hope you're right, _mon frère_" said Henri as he turned to his brother. "We'll keep an eye on him – we can't be too careful."

"We?"

"Lapin."

"O' course!"

"If dat _assassin imbécile_ do anyt'ing suspicious, we'll be prepared."

Remy thanked with his eyes. Henri was by the door when he turned around to his brother one last time. "Remember what happened last time you refused to listen to me?" Henri knew he was touching a deep wound, but that would be his last resort to try to make Remy change his mind. "Someone innocent died."

Henri watched brokenhearted as Remy's face darkened. "You don't have to remind me" he said gravely. "I know Genevieve's death was my fault. Wasn't for me, she wouldn't've fallen."

"It wasn't your fault. Dat monster would've found her an' killed her anyway. But, hadn't you been so selfish and listened to me, as you always did since you were a _petit garçon_, mabbe... just mabbe you could've saved her."

Remy opened his mouth to speak when someone knocked on the door.

"My two sons together" said Jean-Luc as he stepped inside the room "a sight dat always brings me happiness."

"_Excusez moi_" said Henri, flashing his brother a last grave look.

"What got into your brother?" questioned Jean-Luc.

Remy shrugged. "_Je n'ai aucune idée_."

"You know what _tante_ Mattie will do—"

"—if she sees me smoking inside de house. Yeah, I know."

Jean-Luc smiled and sat down at the foot of the bed. "I'm very proud of you, _fils_."

"Dat's something you don't hear every day."

Jean-Luc disregarded the impertinent comment. "I want you to know dat if I had any doubts of your feelings for Marius Boudreaux's daughter, I would never have talked you into dis."

"You didn't talk me into anyt'ing, papa" the young man asserted with conviction, and looked away, even though there was sincerity in his words. "I'm doing dis 'cause I know it de right thing to do."

Jean-Luc called his son's name so that the boy would look into his eyes before he spoke again. "Take de care… de affection you have for dat young woman... dis innocent love you've felt for each other since childhood, and turn into somet'ing real; a husband and wife kinda love and not just a Romeo and Juliette game."

Remy assented. "_Merci_, papa."

Without further ado, Jean Luc saw himself out, leaving his son alone with his thoughts.

* * *

That was it, Remy thought as he stared at the colors of the church's windowpane, on the day that would change his life forever – however, not the way he expected.

That was how Mercy found him: hands inside the tuxedo's pockets, faraway look on his face.

"How's your heart?" she asked as she came closer to him.

Remy turned to his sister-in-law and smiled. "Racing."

"I know how you feeling. Even t'ough my wedding was so many years ago."

"I remember dat day clearly" said Remy with a smile and soft voice. "Henri tried so hard to hide, but you could tell he was scared to death."

Mercy laughed. "Dat's how Henri is. You were just a little boy back den. Dis size" she pointed to her shoulder. "Now look at you! A man about to get married. You look so handsome."

Remy remembered his brother broke out in a cold sweat on his wedding day and he, as a good thirteen-year-old younger brother, made fun of Henri as much as he could.

Now, looking down at his own hands, they weren't sweaty.

Mercy noticed his thoughts were far away. "You afraid you're making de wrong decision?" she asked with all affection she had for her brother-in-law.

"_Non_" he replied, absent-mindedly. "It's not dat."

"What is it den?"

"And if I say I don't really know?"

"I understand. It's okay to have doubts, it's okay to... be afraid of what's next. Only time can make t'ings right."

And so he hoped.

* * *

Émile Lapin stood next to Henri at the altar as discretely as possible.

"Anyt'ing outta de ordinary, Émile?"

"_Non_. Not'ing, cousin" he replied with an expression as apprehensive as Henri's. "Everyt'ig's how it's supposed t' be."

"Keep your eyes open."

"_Certainement_. You talk to him?" questioned Émil after a brief pause.

"_Oui_. It didn't take. He's as stubborn as a legitimate LeBeau" Henri paused; observed the church, the guests arriving. "Look at them. T'ieves on one side, Assassins on de other."

"Armed to de teeth" Émile pointed out. "Look! Mercy's coming. How is he?"

"He's calm" she replied as she stood between the two men, "but also confused."

Henri snorted. "I wish dere was another way."

"You de best man, right, Henri?" asked Émile.

"Yeah" Henri replied, although he didn't understand the question.

"So you have de rings."

"Yes."

"No rings, no wedding" Émile concluded triumphantly.

Mercy laughed and elbowed him.

"What? De mood's too dark right now. Dis feels more like a funeral dan a wedding."

Moments later, Remy joined them. "Talkin' about me?"

"If you actually listened to me" said Henri, scowling.

"Come, Remy" said Mercy, tugging at his arm. Although she shared her husband's point of view as to the wedding, at that moment, all she wanted was to see her beloved brother-in-law's happiness. "Stand here; de bride should be here at any moment."

As Mercy calculated, within few minutes the music announced the pride's coming. Bella Donna walked down the aisle arm in arm with her father, wearing a traditional, white dress.

Seeing how radiant she looked comforted Remy's heart. And when she smiled at him as she held his hand at the altar, he knew there was no looking back. There was nowhere else he wanted to be.

When the priest questioned if anyone had reason to object to the wedding, Mercy squeezed Henri's hand and flashed him a warning look. "Don't try anything stupid" she murmured.

"I'm not de one you need t' worry about, Mercy."

During the ceremony, both Henri and Émile kept their eyes fixed on Julien. He was clearly anxious and impatient. Nonetheless, not once did he show any intention of interfering.

Everything was going according to the plan. The young bride and groom made their vows, exchanged rings and a passionate kiss. They were pronounced husband and wife before God.

Arm in arm and grinning, they walked out of the church, knowing that from that moment on there was a new life ahead.

**xXxXx**

**Glossary****: **

_Quoi - _What?

_À demain – _See you tomorrow

_Mon frère – _My brother

_Tante – _Aunt

_Julien est unniais_ – Julien is a fool.

_Assassin imbécile – _Foolish assassin

_Petit garçon – _Boy

_Je n'ai aucune idée_ – I have no idea.

_Fils – _Son

_Certainement – _Certainly

**xXxXx**


	3. When the unexpected happens

**xXxXx**

Conflicting thoughts filled up the girl's weary head. Her faith, now shaken, had been vivified by promises. Promises that turned out to be only… promises.

The bitter taste of disappointment mixing into the bitterness of tears suppressed for so long that now emerged deliberately.

Her eyes of a deep green color always obfuscated by thick black lines in a futile attempt to hide them. Still, they had never lost their brightness completely... before that night.

Under her eyes black smudges; traces of what her makeup had been. Tears kept on rolling down her cheeks, leaving black marks on her porcelainlike skin. Her half-closed eyelids exposed all the doubts that the seventeen-year-old girl was feeling.

But she was so fed up, so fed up with hesitating. The countless disillusions she had gone through all those years led her to take the rashest decision of her life.

She had come to the conclusion that she didn't want to live anymore.

Leaning her body over the edge of the roof she tried to scream, but her voice seemed inexistent such as in a nightmare.

She made a superhuman effort to empty her head, but that seemed impossible. How could she not think about her suffering if it felt like it was everything there was left in her heart? She got to the point of thinking that her heart had already stopped beating; however, the lacerating pain that ripped her chest open day after day proved her wrong.

In a symbolic gesture she opened her arms and took a step forward. Now or never. She would put an end to her suffering once and for all or would probably never have the guts to do it again.

Spinning out of control, her thoughts turned to the people who cared for her. She would let them down again – one last time.

She knew they would mourn. But they didn't understand, they never knew how to help her. Had to stop putting them first and start thinking of herself, otherwise, no one else would.

She could no longer ignore the pain, go on pretending to endure it. Didn't want to live any longer if it meant living as it was. And in spite of it all, she couldn't help but feeling remorse for her friends, the only family she had ever known.

She didn't want them to blame themselves, but was also sure that their pain would fade away eventually until they could finally stop wondering why she did what she did.

Perhaps they would be better off without her.

She lowered her head until her chin brushed her chest, and closed her eyes asking for foreignness for what she was about to do. If there was a God, then it meant she would go to Hell after that night.

Not that she truly believed in it, still, could clearly remember her brother's words, telling her that God tested all. It had always sounded like an excuse for all pain. On the other hand, it was hope for better days that gave her the strength to go on.

Maybe the time to test the theory of Heaven had come.

The last thought that ran through her head, however, was the wish that something, someone would stop her from jumping. She asked, begged for something to happen.

Opened her eyes again to realize that nothing had changed. No one had heard her prayers.

Perhaps she wouldn't go to Hell after all. Would simply fall into oblivion.

Once again, her eyes were shut, this time even tighter. She tried not to think of anything else, tried to forget the cold of the wind that came before the rain.

Leaned forward and everything turned to white.

The anticipation of her fall made her burst with emotions, a cacophony of conflicting emotions. Relief and regret; freedom and prison; fright and fearlessness as she leaned over a little more. One step forward on that roof and she would fall.

That was when the imaginable occurred. At first, Rogue thought that it was her imagination messing with her head or that maybe she had already fallen. Still, the hands that held her and pulled her by the waist were very real.

* * *

In a split second, Gambit thought he was seeing an angel spreading her wings to fly; her white mantle floating with the wind granted her an angelical aura. Nonetheless, to his total desperation, he soon realized what was really happening and did not hesitate to intervene. Just the thought of watching the girl's body falling down made a cold shiver run up his spine.

He wouldn't let it happen.

Not again.

He had no idea of what was taking her to those extremes, but wouldn't doubt she was making the biggest mistake of her life.

Gasping for air, Rogue turned around, and her eyes, blurred by tears, fell upon eyes that seemed to be two flames burning in the sky on a starless night.

Demoniac and irresistible. Could be Hell if it weren't for the beauty of the face behind those eyes.

Maybe it was the perfect miscellanea between Heaven and Hell.

Still holding her tightly by the waist, he tried to bring her closer to the skylight from where they both had gone up, at the same time trying to stop her from noticing his intention.

"Ah know you" she murmured as soon as she found her voice again, fixing a glance into the young man's perplexed face.

For many seconds he kept quiet until he finally found the words to say. "I doubt it, _petite_. I'd remember your face" he replied with sincerity that surprised even himself.

"Ah've seen your face before..." she said as her trembling hand came closer to his face; white fingers yearning to touch him to make sure he was real, although never making contact "in a dream."

Staring at her pale and confused face, Gambit tried not to think of what could have pushed the girl into contemplating taking her own life. Questions would have to wait, all he wanted now was to take her away from the roof and to a safe place.

"Look, let's go down and den we can talk, _d'accord_?" he offered in an affable voice, luckily he didn't let the agony that situation was causing him shine through.

She lowered her head slightly, forcing her eyes to move away from his. She soon assented with a nod of her head. Then, her eyes fell upon his hands holding her waist firmly.

"Great!" he exclaimed, relieved. Easier than he predicted it would be. The fact that she had accepted to get out of there so fast assured him that interfering was the right call. "I want you to hold tight onto the lapels of my coat. Can you do dat?" he asked as he noticed her hands wouldn't stop shaking.

"Yes" she whispered, and did as he asked. Effortfully, her fingers grabbed the fabric of his coat as her teeth chattered from the cold.

Gambit could feel the stiffness of her body, which ended up hindering his movements. Carefully, he helped her down the attic and then the corridor. Not a second did she show resistance.

Although the light on the corridor was dim, now Gambit could have a better look at the face of the girl whose life he had just saved in more ways than he could have imagined.

The poor girl had a ghostly paleness to her; trembled violently and her eyes seemed to be out of focus. She swayed as soon as her bare feet touched the ground.

Realizing she wouldn't be able to stand on her feet without his support, Gambit swiftly reached for her, and scooped her up in bridal style; her arms instinctively wrapped around his neck. She was very light, he noticed, many months of lack of substantial eating habits.

Gambit wondered about what to do next.

It was past three a.m., there was no one awake as far as he could tell. He feared that if he left her there to go get help, somehow, she would climb up the roof again, and, as unlikely as that seemed to be, he preferred not to take any chances on that matter. On the other hand, he knew well that he may give the wrong impression by showing up with her in his arms.

He then remembered that the man who had welcomed him that afternoon was a telepath. He closed his eyes and focused. Gambit didn't know how to do that and his mental shields didn't help matters, either. Still he tried. _I need help. I need help_, he said mentally, but received no answer.

"_Merde!_" the clock was ticking, he had to do something.

Luckily, she did not seem to be hurt, at least not physically, only emotionally fazed. Her trembling did not diminish. "Hey" he called her softly. Rogue looked up at him. What was that? Shame? Fear? "Where's your bedroom?"

She looked away for a moment and when her eyes met his again she seemed to have grown even paler, if that was possible. "Take me somewhere else" she asked in a feeble, slurred voice. She seemed reasonable despite the situation. "There's someone there, she'll wanna know what happened, she'll ask questions" she continued sincerely, controlling herself as much as she could. "Take me somewhere else. Please."

"I'll call your Professor. He'll tell us what to do—"

"No!" she cut him off, afflictedly. "You can't do that. You can't tell anybody about this" she then took a deep breath in. "Ah know you have no reasons to do what Ah'm asking, you don't know me... you don't even know mah name, but... please don't tell anybody, at least not tonight. I wouldn't know what to say."

His doubtful eyes fixed on her pleading ones. Gambit had to make a decision quickly. "No, I don't know you, I don't know de reason you had to—" he almost said it, however, he held it back in time, quickly blocking out the thought of the girl falling down. It was too familiar of a scene to be bearable. He shook his head and spoke again. "I can't leave you alone to try dat again knowing dat I could've stopped you" _I got too many regrets in my life already_, he added to himself.

She hung her head, abashed. "Ah won't do it again. Ah don't even know what I was doing."

"_Je suis desolé, petite_, but I have to make sure. I have to tell someone about dis. You leave me no choice" he felt for her but that was the most viable course of action.

She closed her eyes tightly, struggling not to break down and cry. Gambit took a moment to observe her. Her hands held his coat so tightly that her fingers had lost all color. Her skin was untanned as if it had never been touched by sunlight. He also noticed she must have been wearing heavy makeup, because not even tears nor sweat could erase the black smudges around her eyes. Her lips were blue, which he thought had been caused by the cold before realizing her fading lipstick.

A sudden urge to see her face without all that makeup took hold of his senses. What color were her eyes?

As though she had heard his question, she looked up, revealing the most beautiful eyes he had ever seen. Not only because of their color or shape, but the pureness that showed. They stared at his face and a cold shiver ran up his body.

Suddenly, Gambit found himself doing something he would later regret. Without saying another word, he carried her to the bedroom where he had been accommodated earlier. Later he would think of a plausible explanation to offer.

As he walked with her in his arms, Rogue pressed her face against his shoulders, thinking she was being taken to the Professor or to any of the mentors. Still, she could not find the strength to fight back; she felt exhausted and her struggle would most certainly be fruitless.

However, to her utter surprise, the young man lay her down on a bed. Rogue released hold of him, and kept her head down and eyes closed, still oblivious to her surroundings until he put a blanket over her shoulders.

Rogue opened her eyes and stared at the stranger's face in awe. The stranger she had waited for for so long, who, so many times, she doubted she would ever find.

She looked around and sighed in relief realizing where she was. "Thank you" she said sweetly looking at his eyes for the last time before she tightly pushed the covers tighter against her trembling body.

He didn't say another word, only got settled in the armchair. His face illegible as his eyes wouldn't move away from her.

"You think Ah'm crazy" she said after a long pause, staring at the window opposite him.

"I have no right to judge you" he replied. "I don't know your motives, but I guess you must've had a hella reason to have tried dat. I admire your courage" he added darkly.

"Don't say that" she said and lost all sweetness that there was in her voice. "You need more courage to keep on living."

And so, none of them dared to say another word.

Rogue lay down with her back to him, watching as the rain started to fall down. Although she wouldn't be able to sleep at all, not for a moment did she dare to turn to him, although she felt the weight of his eyes on her back.

Her head hurt more that she thought she could handle. The consequences of what had happened and what could have happened tormented her. She dwelled on recent events and, on balance, there seemed to be all but sadness. Her whole life was upside down.

And above all thoughts there was him. The man whose name she ignored, but whom she was destined to know as deeply as the most intimate of lovers. The man whose presence exacerbated the chaos of her life.

How many times had she remembered that face and silently prayed to God for him to be real. And after all, he was.

**xXxXx**

**Glossary**_**:**_

_D'accord? – _Ok?

_Merde – _Shit

_Je suis désolé – _I'm sorry


End file.
